Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Respectful Relationships 

It is spring and time to plow under what was yesterday and last year and what has gone before.
You cannot plant a new crop, a new relationship, a new attitude with unplowed consciousness.
What tries to grow through the leftovers of the past will never yield beautiful fruit.
It is essential that we complete each day with no resentment, guilt or blame.

Being respectful is a willingness to see the person anew, without the baggage of yesterday.
When we remember the mistakes, pain and hurtful experiences, we continue the toxicity.
When we forgive, “erase with love” and release what was, we open the way for new growth.
When we hold the past against ourselves and one another, we tend to continue the same patterns.

In relationships, everyone is learning, healing the past and growing in the consciousness of Love.
Where there is limitation, there is fear and caution.
Where there is doubt, suspicion and questioning, there is fear and distrust.

The work in all relationships with ourselves and others is to remember to love unconditionally.
Love is letting go of fear.
Love is forgiving the past.
Love is a creative energy, not an emotional attachment.

When we love as the fairy tales and romantic fantasies have taught, we are captivated by the images.
When we commit to love another, we are called to release the myth and choose to learn and heal.
When we are willing to Love another, we come to realize.
Love is our natural state and loving is simply the willingness to Be with what is.

Love is about giving and creating, healing and growing.
Love is not about getting and fixing, demanding and changing.
Love is the willingness to join in vision, be honest with our choice, commit to give our best, demonstrate respect, be responsible for our actions and interactions.
The work of Loving is in letting go of our blocks to Love.

Love never ends.
Love never quits.
Love never hates.
Love may change forms, but it continues beyond time and space, circumstance and emotions.

Honorable closure or completion of a loving relationship is just as valuable as staying within the relationship.  It is done with love, respect and gratitude.
Everyday can be a day of honorable closure.
You can do it by yourself or in the Presence of the other.
Honorable closure is done for our own benefit and yields peace and gratitude when done completely.

Blessing us all in completing the loving work we continue to do in all our relationships.
Loving you, Betty Lue

Honorable Closure       

How do you complete a relationship, a marriage, a teaching-learning experience, a job, a friendship?
 How do you know you are really complete?
Often people walk away without really finishing the spiritual work, because it is easier emotionally.  
People don’t know how to come to a truly peaceful place, where “good-bye” is really “God be with You.”
When we are complete, we are at peace and in love.
We have no regrets, no resentments, no unhappy memories.

Honorable closure acknowledges:
1)   the learning and growth received,
2)   challenges and difficulties experienced,
3)   appreciation of gifts and blessings,
4)   forgiveness and amends made.

Acknowledge within your self and with the other person all that you have learned and how you have grown and benefited from the experience.
Honor and express the challenges and difficulties that occurred and perhaps were endured during the time together.
Offer your gratitude and appreciation to the other for the benefits you received.
Share your forgiveness and/or make amends for those places of unconscious or conscious errors of omission or commission.
 Often neither party is aware of what went unexpressed until the two have an opportunity to talk together.
This is very valuable when done with the conscious intention for a peaceful conclusion.
And lastly, give your full appreciation and blessings to those whom you are leaving.  
Honorable closure always includes a face to face or heart to heart connection so that all parties have a full opportunity to express their piece of the whole.
Incompletion is never one sided. If one party loses and is in grief neither person is at peace.
Do your part when you part.
When we complete a relationship, job, living situation with honor for all, we are free to choose again without being haunted by the past or unconsciously repeating the same patterns.
 To move on, to create anew, to be fully inspired requires honorable closure.  Begin now.
Saying good-bye can be done with love, respect and profound gratitude and inner peace.